Loss Without Grieving

Many people have experienced some form of loss in their lives. Some may have lost a loved one and they grieve every day. Some may have lost a pet and things will never be quite the same. Others may have lost  a marriage, and some may even have guilt in the midst of their pain. Some may have lost a dream for one reason or another. But, generally speaking, loss brings about some form of grief. Can you relate? I am sure that you are thinking of something right now, aren't you?

So, here I am being transparent and brutally honest. I AM NOT GOING TO MISS MY PERIOD! Whew but that felt so good to say! I even made up a little song last night about it the whole thing since I have my surgery scheduled. I will not miss the pain. I will not miss the cramping. I will not miss the extra bathroom runs during work. I will not miss trying to "hide" the feminine products when I go to the store . I will not miss embarrassing my husband by having him go and get them for me. I will not miss the extra mess in the bathroom every month. I will not miss having to find a female at the check-out register. I will not miss having to leave work because of an "accident." I will not miss not "being in the mood." I will not miss making sure I have a  bottle of Motrin with me at all times. Again, I am not going to miss my period - not one bit!

I am losing something, I do realize that. But I have a life to live and I am looking forward to being able to enjoy those in my life that ARE worth missing when they are not around. I am looking forward to the day when I can have my husband love me at any time. I am looking forward to spending time with my aging parents BEFORE they are gone. I am looking forward to being able to help friends who are suffering and hurting in their REAL losses. I am looking forward to feeling like a 'normal' human being, without the added stresses that I feel in just having been born a woman. I am going to be just as much a woman after my hysterectomy as I am right now, The difference is that after that scheduled date I am going to be able to ENJOY BEING a woman!